Mistakes women make in relationships
Love is the brick that holds our lives together, no wonder the word of God declares that God is love.
There is no more justification for undying love than this. But there are times when the problems of having two couples in a relationship often prove problematic because the two individuals who profess love for each other do not understand each other.
It is best, however if the woman knows what often offend the man, so that she might take precaution and thereby avoid unnecessary confrontations with the man he loves.
But who will be in the best position to tell what often offend men in a relationship? Your answer is as good as mine.
Men need to enlighten the womenfolk on things they often do that make them to want to jilt the ladies.
A wise lady would definitely want to study this article and put her relationship with her man in good order to avoid the mistakes that can spell doom for her dream husband or Mr. Right.
Therefore, this article is a scanning of the heart of men and seven major reasons they often change one lady after the other and how you can avoid such experience by avoiding the mistakes that their victims makes.
What is love?
What is love?
Love is the building block of life. God has designed us all as a creation that is capable to share our deepest feelings with one another and especially with a man or woman of our dreams, when he made us. The reason is not farfetched, to sustain existence in the long run, and to make a gift out of life.
It is in us to greatly desire to want a soul mate at the right time, to find a soul mate at the right time of our adult life. In a real sense, there is no boring a life compare to a life without a soul-mate.
A woman without a soul-mate quickly becomes tagged a witch by other people, she is lonely and touchy. Likewise, a man without a soul - mate is often very untidy and quickly growing old.
However, Love has the power to cure all these emotional anomalies. So the saying goes; love conquers all.
Nevertheless, having a relationship that last for a lifetime and stand the test of time is out of financial bargain, it neither come out of wishful thinking or what money can buy, it is often the rigorous but the silent work of the persons in such relationships and their great contributions to the success of the said relationship.
The one with the highest contribution to a relationship can be the lady or the guy, he or she knows what she has seen in the other mate that makes him wants her.
These and some other virtuous ideals are what often bound all of us in a particular romantic relationship at one time or the other.
Meanwhile, love is the soul of relationship. In other words, relationship does not exist hitherto, the word of God has said “Can two walk together except that they agree?” Love makes every relationship possible.
Love nonetheless is chain-like; it hangs on loops created from the familiarity that proceeds relationships and continue on favorable links and loops that continue on the chain.
A healthy love relationship can only survive with the following in place.
3. Pressure from home
4. Desire to procreate
5. Social acceptance. Etc.
Without the above values in place, love relationship can hardly develop and if it does, it will suffer such setback that will make it grow stunted if at all.
We can’t help it, anyway, therefore we must provide for these pre-requisite loops of love-relationship.
Every person that has the desire to win the heart of another person must have equal resources to go about it.
If you want someone so much because such has a crush on you and you lack the mental resources to approach the person, then you will only burn inside. If there is anyone you love, then build up courage to say it to their face what you really feel.
Do not leave the person to figure it out that you love them on the way you look at them. Being a woman may have some limitation to this, but there is always a way to go about it being a woman without sacrificing your moral values.
It is selective affection and fondness that make most ladies keep the company of the one they are tripping for, from this they create a long lasting closeness that often ends in love.
Maybe, that is how the largest population of people in love-relationship achieved the love of their life.
Well, love does not go empty hand; there are always hands-out exchanging hands.
The question however is, your fancy-sweetheart may take time to say I do. As a man, do you have the patient that will still win her to you? And as a woman, do you have followers or male admirers that may force the willing affection of that one person (that is taking time to speak his mind) to act very soon? Such opportunities are what we seldom have in our blossom and God help us if we make a very judicious use of them. One needs to consider this as an opportunity.
Although other opportunities are always coming, but one particular opportunity might take an eternity to repeat itself, that Is why, the oft quote assertion, “opportunity once loss may never be regained” is worthwhile.
Do not waste the opportunities you have hand, it might be the source of your lasting happiness, do not gamble with it.
Pressure from home
Most men will want a life of sowing their wild oath to continue forever, thanks to good parents that longs for the joy of grand – parenting.
When one has the pressure of getting married to deal with the right things may start to fall into the right places for such an individual.
A woman ripe for marriage will definitely be more serious than another who still felt she still has the time to enjoy herself.
As such, love relationships will naturally thrive between two individuals whose perspective of the nearest future agrees with one another, and a great deal of relationship progress can easily be made.
Another factor on the pressure angle is becoming downcast and eager to take the next line of serious action that it requires to get committed to a relationship with people around you becoming husbands to some people and wives to some men.
You will not like to be left behind would you? Pressures often get us to make the decision that the heart gets us postponing because we want to hang on to make a choice.
We don’t often have the pleasure of that choice sometimes in a love relationship.
Desire to procreate
Great for you if you will be led by desire to procreate into love relationships.
That is just taking the bull by the horn. We are in the game to give what we have been given, which is life, to another set of people.
Once it is the due age and time; why not? However, such desire should never ever be abused. Do not make mistakes of becoming pregnant to get the man stock to you.
It is a grave sin. Hold, let the right decision come.
It is wrong to think that with your power, you can force people to do what they will not do naturally, especially in a love - relationship, all because you hold the ace as a woman.
You may have what you want- a man of some repute to father your child. But you inadvertently disrupt the future, both of your own and the children you want to raise.
Men are very keen at fight back when a lady gets herself pregnant against their wish.
They may deny being responsible, they may suggest that you terminate the pregnancy (at your own risk and emotional burden) they may allow you have the child without becoming your husband and without seizing from frustrating, obstructing or disturbing your inner peace.
Men who have children out of wedlock or from mistress never seize to be such women’s husband, also they never were.
Then, if the woman marries another man it makes that woman to have more than one husband, with divided emotions.
In a short sentence the mistake number one any woman can make is to force herself on a man by becoming pregnant for him without his consent, the woman may live with the consequence all her life.
Then what is the best thing you can do in case you have a man with all the cash and you want him to be yours? Just ask him what he wants you for in his life, a wife or just another bedmate.
Do you have self esteem? That is, do you feel like it is a sin or moral deprivation to give yourself to a man so he might just quench his sexual appetite and find his way? Now do you want a child to come from this as your first child? Is the man the best man that your life can ever attract at your present age? So many questions as these can set you free.
6 mistakes which women make in relationships with men
1. Mistakes of social acceptance
3. Mistake of character
4. Mistake of controlling him
5. Mistakes of wanting too much so soon
6. Mistake of wrong mindset
1. Mistakes of social acceptance
Many women are presently in pitiable conditions all around the corners of the country, if not the world, living with the regret of what has become their lot as a result of uncorrectable mistakes of social acceptance, which led them to wrong path of life.
One particular young lady is a living example of falling in love for the wrong reason, to have greater social acceptance than her peers.
The lady, whose story inspires the following narration, is simply known as Sandra, lives with her brother in Badagry.
There she works as a petrol attendant with a popular petrol station. She has the right frame of mind and body, and she lives a walking distance from home.
However, Sandra had a desire for the big things, she felt it would be right that a man with a big jeep or another big vehicle as that to be her heartthrob.
She said she can never settle for a man that is not mobile, she prefers a man that has a car.
Though this was her personal taste, she often disdains a man who comes on their legs to woo her as being poor folks that hardly can feed themselves in their one room apartment.
Sometimes, dreams do come true, one afternoon, a particular man came to the dispenser and as soon as he saw Sandra, and another guy that also works at the station, he insists that Sandra must be the one to dispense fuel for his jeep.
The lady felt like, ‘what is going on?’ A little smile cross her nice face and the man, who is not bad looking starts to chat her up.
In their conversation, Sandra gets to know that the man imports car from the neighboring country.
The man from the every day starts to patronize Sandra and both soon exchange contact.
Meanwhile, Sandra that had now become so engrossed with the ‘importer’ so soon originally came to the petrol station to raise some money she will need to further her education too tertiary institution, But now, she is fast forgetting her primary reason at work for a new spark of romance that has become her lot.
Her importer lover promised her that everything she ever need would be provided for her and that she should not worry about her school, once the contract he is working on yields, everything Sandra needs as school fees would be provided.
In fact the young ladies (who have a womanly body, though she was only 20) were simply overjoyed. She couldn’t believe all these were really happening to her.
She could no longer hide her joy; hence she made known what has been happening to her in the closet to her parent.
What can the old folks do? They only felt that maybe the young woman is a lucky girl, she has met with luck early in life.
That was what they thought; perhaps the man will help her as a Godsend.
But what could the man want in such a young secondary school leaver? He may want to marry her afterwards, he had not actually come clear about his interest, but sincerely he won’t be doing all this without desire to marry the young lady at some point in time.
That is just enough to be read from the way the two lovers were just over one another. The man, simply called Mr, Andrew is a well travelled and a multi-linguist.
He knew so many places and speaks more than five international languages.
Six months into the game, Sandra had worn a new look, her tummy is now becoming protruding and she couldn’t keep routine at her place of work any longer.
Now neighbor began to wonder what could be happening to Sandra all so soon.
But as the days turn to weeks, it became clear that Sandra is actually pregnant, for no other man but the same man, Mr. Andrew. So all her academic concerns that have been her greatest priority before now must rest?.
Sandra’s father was mad at his own daughter’s experience, while the mother concludes with the opinion that what will happen will happen.
But the worst is yet to come. The new development caused Sandra’s family to really beep more search-light into the personality of Mr. Andrew in order to know relatively scarce to see.
No one knows how to find him as his whereabouts was not too clear.
But one faithful morning, while going through her articles, Sandra discovered the card she was given by Mr., Andrew the first evening they met; now she held it tentatively as though all her life depends on it. Even though sorrow did overtake her heart, she quickly took the card to her mother.
“Mum, I have found Mr. Andrews contact address, ” she shout at the passage. Her mother, who was behind the house was now standing. Akimbo she said “Eh, eh glory be to God , so you have now decided to bring out the card at last, wicked one? I know you are anxious to become a mother, you will surely regret this; silly girl.”
She took the card and shows it to Sandra’s father, who now prepare men to follow his as they traced the man’s address to downtown Lagos.
To cut the story short, it was found that Mr. Andrew works in the embassy as a driver and he only has access to vehicles attached to the embassy, while he often used to cruise around town himself as if the vehicle really belongs to him.
Mr. Andrew was no importer at last, but a liar and a pretender. It was a painful experience to Sandra, who had now realized her own mistakes.
Mr. Andrew came back to Badagry as he was instructed by his boss.
He took out of his salary to get a room apartment, and a rush ‘introduction’ was done for Sandra to become a housewife sooner than she ever dreamt.
She had thought Mr. Andrew was a man of ‘timber and caliber,’ she was simply deceived by the appearance of what she values as necessary for romance.
Important Life’s Lesson
It is a normal thing that any woman should dream big and want the good thing in life. It definitely is not a sin. However, a woman should not or never hang such big dream on what a man must present to be worthy of having a relationship with, instead, if any lady so dream- to be a big woman, she must be ready to work hard and show herself diligently in her own cause, and let her altitude and attainment attract such favor she desire to her in a man.
Wanting great favor without an equally developed mind is an opportunity for crafty men who go about showing or pretending to be greatly rich or flamboyant life to devour women of easy virtue on the platter of wanting to help or please them.
Avoid common relationship mistake
If any man comes around offering to render unsolicited assistance, a woman should really play safe and be wary of what is not yet known to her about this sudden helper, he might be a destiny spoiler in disguise, who is only looking for the next victim.
And once you found that out about such an individual, avoid taking the risk of “I will prove to him that I am smarter than him.”
You may be playing with danger. A woman may do that and get away with it.
Even your friends might have a similar experience, coming out of it in time as victor, but just ask yourself, how sure are you that you will be so lucky having to deal with a creepy and crafty men?
People have different character and determination to press the thought of their heart. In a nutshell, do not let or allow social acceptance derail your right judgment of what determines good relationship.
Social acceptance is important, but it is the duty of a woman to build her relationship to be enviable by people around her to extent that people would start to command her as having a successful relationship. Remember the word of God that says “a wise woman builds her own house…”
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Posted by December 17, 2016 and have 1 comments, Published at